I started this little ole blog this past May as a creative outlet to express myself, document my family’s story and share ideas with anyone anyone who would listen . I love being a stay-at-home mom, but I feel like I’ve lost myself in the whole process. I tend to give 100% to my kids and nothing to me. I know there has to be a balance and I’m trying to find it. Tell me I’m not alone?
I remember when my first was born and she didn’t sleep for the first 3 months. I thought I was going to die (true story…it was close). I kind of wanted to shove her back in to be honest. It.was.tough. I think it was a mixture of us not not knowing what exactly to do as first time parents, the fact that she was allergic to dairy and I had to cut it completely out of my diet (I breastfed) and that she had acid re-flux. Oh boy was this a joyous time for us. Everyone said it would get better and of course it did, but it took a whole stinkin’ 3 months.
I was a career-woman and had been working my way up the corporate ladder ever since college. Little did I know that my first child would refuse to take a bottle. We tried everything and it was so miserable for everyone. This was one tough baby! I tried daycare for 2 whole weeks (only an hour or two each day) before they told me I couldn’t take her there because she won’t take a bottle. We were at a loss of what to do, but I took it as a sign from God that I was meant to stay at home. My hubby had lost his job (this was during the bust of the economy and everything was going downhill…fast) while I was 7 months pregnant and it took 2 months for him to find another one, which means he had only been employed for about a week before the baby was born. Times were tough, but I do believe everything happens for a reason. It was hard for me to quit a career and company that I adored. The people were spectacular and I actually enjoyed going to work each day, which is hard to find.
I remember staying at home 9+ hours a day and not having any adult interaction and a baby who (now 3 months old) slept a lot of the time. Eat.Sleep.Poop…that was my life. I don’t know why, but I actually somewhat cared about what people thought of me. Did they think I sat on the couch and ate bon-bons all day??? Think that I went shopping and spent money that I didn’t make myself??? I was young and naive, but I do think a lot of moms go through this same thing. So, maybe I’m normal? ;)
After a while, I got used to my new “job” as a mom and really could care less what others thought. Once Baby #1 turned about 6 months old, things started to get a lot easier and I’d venture out of the house all of the time. One of my favorite memories was pushing her in the jogging stroller everyday. She’d take in the sites of the world (or nap) and I’d get my run in. It was a win-win! I started to love what I did. Sure, there were moments where I wished I could get out of the house for even an hour, but again…I think that’s normal. My daughter never did take a bottle and eventually I became okay with that.
Fast forward 2 years and my son was born. You’d think it would be harder going from 1 kid to 2, but for me, it was easier. I like to be busy and constantly doing something and that’s definitely what happened. He was such an easy baby. I really think I “put in my time” with the first one and God was giving me a pass on this one ;-)
Fast forward to now and I’m due to have Baby #3 in less 2 weeks. This pregnancy has by far gone the fastest of all of them for me. I’m pretty sure chasing after the first two kiddos have allowed for that. I feel less prepared with this one and kind of haven’t had a chance for it to sink in that I will have to deliver this baby soon. It is what it is and he/she will come when he/she pleases. I guess it gets that way with the more you have??? I wonder if it’ll be just as easy to go from 2 to 3 as it was from 1 to 2? Anyone??
So, after 5 years of being pregnant and nursing, I started this little blog for me and my little family. Someday, I hope they get to look back at how we spent our days, how much love we have and how we tried to live life to the fullest. I believe in letting a kid be a kid. They get one chance at it and as a parent, I definitely plan on letting them have that. There are days when we don’t even get out of our pajamas and they love it. Some days we might watch too much tv or don’t eat balanced meals, but you know what? It doesn’t matter because they had fun. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in structure and routine too, but every once in a while it’s good to bend the rules a bit.
As the kiddos get older, it gets easier to manage your time and they learn to play with each other or by themselves. I find little slots of time throughout the day to do some crafting, bake a cake or a fancy dinner. Most of the time, the kids want to help, which is awesome! I truly believe in letting kids make a mess, if it means they are learning. I don’t want to be that parent that does everything and lets their kids to nothing. Don’t get me wrong, I’m Type A and have definitely had a hard time with this, but sooner or later, you learn to let go and let it ride. If you don’t let your kids help out, how are they supposed to learn? So, even though things might not be perfect in the end, they had a ball and are so proud of what they’ve accomplished. My house isn’t perfect…it never will be, but it’s perfect for us. There is always a mess somewhere that needs to be cleaned, but you let it go. To stress over it, just isn’t worth it. Pick your battles. I’d rather do a craft project with the kids than clean the bathroom anyway. There’s always tomorrow for the dirty work, so enjoy today with the family. There are times I lose it (don’t we all???), but I get over it pretty quick and realize it’s not worth it (sometimes after the hubby tells me so ;-) ).
So, enjoy life to the fullest, stop and smell the roses and if you’re having a bad day, realize that ‘this too shall pass’. What the heck, start a blog about it. Happy Monday :-)